No Title.

Last night I played cards and practiced English with Milagros, who is essentially a mini-me; she dances like a mad-woman, makes ridiculous faces, sings opera songs, loves reading and often speaks in funny accents. Milagros decided that she was going to practice counting (in English), and started jumping up and down while she said each number. As she was doing this, I found myself crying (not something I do very often) because it hit me that in nine days I will be leaving these beautiful children who completely stole my heart. Even as I write this, I am holding back tears.  

I suppose this post is just a recap of my whole entire trip: things and people I will miss, along with what God has taught me about Himself, His Word, and myself.

Things/ people I will miss:

1.       1. Peruvian food.

 Even though I found myself dreading rice with every meal, I will truly miss Peruvian cuisine. Causa, Ceviche, beans, the delicious little salad that we have sometimes at the home,  Estofado de Pollo, Aji, Inca Kola...the list goes on and on.

2. The weather.

 It doesn’t rain here (there are little sprinkles of “rain” every once in a while), but besides that, the weather is always perfect. I have experienced both Winter & Summer here, and I still love it.

3. Every single child in the hogar.
Especially: Kelly Kriz, Lizandra, Milagros, Jefferson, Emerson, Maythe and Isabella.

Like I said before, these children have had such a huge impact on me. It hasn’t always been easy, and sometimes I was unsure as to why I was even here. However, the more time I spent with them I realized that the biggest thing I could do was to love them, and spend time with them. They are such amazing children, and they have so much to offer this world. They have shown me unconditional love, and have given me an even greater desire to work with children and to do missions.   

4. The IDL people!! Once I started working at the church, I met eight wonderful people in the IDL program. They are all so friendly, and try their hardest to speak to me in English (Joanna and Maka speak English really well). Despite the language barrier, we have become good friends, and they have blessed me so very much- more than they probably even know.

And finally, what has God been showing me throughout this whole trip?
Like I’ve said in the past, the biggest thing is trust.

I came here wanting to find answers.

Answers to questions like:
- What am I doing with my life?
- Am I supposed to do missions long term?

As I am leaving Peru, I seem to have more questions than before.

I can honestly say I feel called to missions. I have such a strong desire to serve and to help hurting people. I love interacting with new people and experiencing new cultures and ways of life.

However, I am leaving Peru not knowing what I am going to do about school; not knowing if I am supposed to come back to Peru right away.

Do I continue at Elmira College and finish my degree?

Do I go to Bible school instead?

Am I supposed to go to China with Campus Target?

I don’t know, and I hate the feeling of the unknown. I like spontaneity, but lately I have felt completely aimless.

Sometimes I think that I have the answer. Sometimes I feel like coming back to Peru to work with Camino de Vida is the right thing to do. The thought of moving to a new country and working with these precious people full-time excites me! It would be quite the adventure.

Then I sit back and feel completely unequipped to accomplish this task. There are so many things in the Bible that I am unsure of!! I don’t feel like one semester of Bible school is enough preparation for full time missions.

I have received emails from different people I’ve met along the way, telling me about various internships and opportunities. It doesn’t help that all of them are absolutely amazing.  

Internship at Hillsong Church in AUSTRALIA!?!?! Awesome!!!

Internship at the Healing Place Church in Baton Rouge, LA??? Fantastic!!!

Spending a year in China?!?!?!? Sign me up now!!!

For a person as indecisive as I am, this is a huge problem. I have so many opportunities to choose from, and all of them (at least I feel) would provide me with preparation for future ministry opportunities.I get so excited about so many things all at once. I hear about one internship and I’m ready to pack my bags and go...then I hear about another, and I try and find a way to fit that into my jam-packed life. My biggest fear is making a decision based solely on how I am feeling. 

Why am I rambling on and on about the choices I have to make? I’m not really sure.

I don’t even know how many of you will take the time to read this whole spiel...

But, the other day I read:

“I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” (Psalm 27:13-14)

This is what God has been telling me lately, and throughout the course of this trip.

To stop talking and complaining and asking for advice from other people, and instead wait and listen. 
I’ve realized that I need to let God do the talking sometimes. 

Welp, I believe that is all for now.
Servolucion starts on Saturday (the church goes out into the community to serve) so I'll probably have a few tales to tell. :)

Adios Amigos.

-Kelly